In which I spend all my money on plants that look like they could come from Perth…
Back in May 2024, Sameer and I moved in together.
And it’s been great.
And I could give a long list of things I like about both living with Sameer (he is quite nice and has a very pretty smile etc etc), and in our new flat (it’s very central and there are nice gardens near it and it’s so so nice being able to have space to host friends and families).
But there are two things that do not please me.
The first, is that the heating is underfloor, and fixed for the block. It can’t be turned down, although apparently you can fully turn it off (?), and because out flat is split across two levels, the front rooms are sort of temperate and the back rooms are fiery like the pits of hell.
The second thing that I find difficult is that the view from our bedroom window is of some office buildings. They’re close – just across the street- which means I could build an intimate relationship with the office workers (potentially too intimate if I forget to draw the privacy blinds) if I wanted too.
But the main issue is that these buildings are really-quite-ugly.
And it doesn’t bring me joy.
I found myself yearning hard for the seasonally-changing tree outside my Berlin flat, and missing the greenery of the city in general.
It turns out that yearning only gets you so far, and if you want things done you really have to do them yourself.
So I bought a tree.

He’s just a baby right now, but I see potential.
It’s a eucalyptus (aka a gum tree), and one that should be able to make it through the not-very-hard English winters, and hopefully also deal with the not-very-much-sun that this country has to offer.
And then, because I sensed that he was lonely, I bought him some friends:

Banksias and Proteas and Hakeas OH MY!
(Also a Callistemon or two)




I first bought about 4 plants, from an online shop called Penbreth Plants, and my experience with the quality was so good that I went back for some more.
I tried to choose the hardier ones, and opted for plants with different kinds of interesting leaves, because I’m not sure they’ll ever manage to flower over here.


Here’s the list:
- Banksia caleyi
- Leucadendron salignum ‘Red’
- Banksia ericifolia var. macrantha
- Banksia grandisHakea trifurcata
- Protea eximea
- Hakea sericea
- Banksia praemorsa ‘Wine Red Form’
- Stenocarpus sinuatus
- Leucadendron discolor


I separately bought a few Callistemons (bottle brushes), and from a third seller tried to buy a nice traditional red and green kangaroo paw.
It came to me as a white variety instead.
I sent the company a photo and they agreed to replace it (after way too much time and hassle), but once the replacement came it was also white.
This time when I showed them proof that I now had two different wrongly-coloured plants (with the wrong cultivar names on the tags no less!) they instead tried to claim that the plant flowers had simply ‘faded due to overwintering’.
Which I suspect is effectively the plant version of ‘pining for the fjords‘
I did a double take, checked with my mum (who was visiting), and checked with my friends (half of who are friggin’ trained Aussie Botanists) and told the online seller they were wrong.
They insisted, I argued (how can the first one be wrong but the second same one is right?) and noted that their website was now sold out of the red variety so they maybe that’s why they were trying to pass off the crappier colour on me. They doubled down, so I lodged a complaint with the selling platform who agreed it was clearly not the right product and refunded me due to false advertising.
All of which is to say that I got a refund but now also have two white kangaroo paws, which I’m not sure will come back after their winter pining diedown.
But in other news, LOOK AT THIS LITTLE FLUFFY BEAUTY:



Let’s hope we eventually have a small bush land!
And for the non-Aussies following along:
Jan, 2025
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